How To Wake Up The Sexual Connection In Your Partner

Whether you’ve been dating your partner for a few months, or have been married for 10 years, it’s normal for you sex life to go through ebbs and flows. Don’t let it shake you and don’t ever have the mistaken belief that it only happens to you two.  Let’s face it, life gets busy and it can be hard to find that time to connect with our partner. Between school drop offs and pick ups, organising the home, groceries, cooking, working, and running around after kids, we’re lucky to find two minutes to ourselves some days, let alone even worry about quality time with our partner. In saying this, a fulfilling sex life is an important component of any successful relationship. If you’ve been noticing yours has gotten off track recently, here are some ways you can wake up the sexual connection in your partner.

4 Ways To Sexually Reconnect

Here are four ways to reconnect with your partner and get your love life back on track.

  1. Love yourself

If you’re looking for a healthy sex drive, then it’s important that you have a good relationship with your body. If you don’t feel comfortable in your skin, or feel disconnected in some way, it will make its way into the bedroom and stop your love life from kicking off. Here are some things that can help:

  • Get outdoors and exercise: a healthy dose of Vitamin D mixed with some good cardio gets the oxygen flowing and will improve your sexual stamina.
  • Take a bath and relax: try using some essential oils to truly enter a state of relaxation and enjoy the feeling of the water on your body and awakening your senses.
  • Masturbate: if there’s one way to reconnect with yourself it’s by rediscovering exactly what gets you off. These benefits will then flow over into your sex life.


  1. Practise daily affirmations

Improve your sex life doesn’t start in the bedroom.  The connection needs to be felt in the relationship before it makes it’s way to the bedroom. A good way to find that connection again is through daily affirmations. Take two minutes each day to tell each other what you appreciate most about them. Here’s some ideas to get you started:

  • “I appreciate what a great mother you are to our kids”.
  • “I appreciate how hard you work for our family”.
  • “I appreciate the sacrifices you have made for us”.
  • “I appreciate you cooking dinner for us tonight”.

They can be big or small appreciations. It will help you both connect on that deeper level with each other and give some perspective to why you’re with them in the first place.


  1. Set the mood

When it’s time to bring it to the bedroom, put a little effort into it. When you’ve been with your partner for a while, you can get so caught up in the busyness of life, that you feel like there’s no time to plan time for yourselves.

It’s a good idea to find a way to leave the worries of the day behind so you can both focus on each other. It could start with a show together while snuggling in bed, or you could go all out and turn the bedroom into a romantic haven.

Set up the candles, get out the massage oil, and make your intentions clear. Your partner will be turned on by your effort and the mood will set the tone for the evening.

  1. Schedule Sex

The idea of scheduling in a sex life can be a turn off for many, but it actually works. There’s no awkward questions in the evening, time wasted trying to gauge if the other person’s interested and no hurt feelings if they’re not.

If you pick two days each week that are put aside for sexual connection, both of you will be prepared for it. It will be on your mind throughout the day and it will be easier to switch off and connect together when you reunite. It also makes it easier to plan ahead and set the mood when you’re partner is expecting it.

Sex is an important part of any intimate relationship, and if you happen to find yourself in an ebb, you’re not alone. Try these four tips to get your way out again and to reconnect with your partner on a deeper level.

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